Adult
Money
I'm
spending all my adult money at once!
$9.95
for On Golden Blonde,
$12.95
for Girls' Town,
$29.95
for Big Butt Latin Babes.
Goodbye,
adult money!
What's
for Dinner?
Dinner
is at tennish, so I thought we'd have a few drinks
firsh.
Monopoly
How
come there's only one game called Monopoly?
Chicken/Egg
Yesterday
I saw a chicken having sex with an egg. Now I
know which came
first.
Fortune
A fortuneteller
moved in next door. She came over and gave
me ten dollars.
"You
don't owe me anything." "You will."
Summer
Summer
began at 3:49 p.m. this afternoon. No one knows
what happened.
SIEGFRIED
AND ROY AND OTHER RHYMES
The
Implants Gal
I don't
care how dumb I be,
Twenty
fools will marry me;
If
twenty won't, forty shall,
I
am my mother's implants gal.
Whitmanic
Poem
Even
though your feet
Smell
like cheese,
I
prefer to think
They
smell
Like
good cheese.
Dow
Is Up
Dow
is up,
Dow
is down,
Dow
is like luck;
Here
a bull,
Here
a bear,
Who
gives a fuck.
Siegfried
and Roy
Siegfried
and Roy
Were
two pretty men,
They
lay in bed
'Till
the clock struck ten:
Then
up starts Siegfried
And
looks at the sky,
Oh!
tiger-tamer Roy,
The
sun's very high;
You
go before
With
the whip and the chair,
And
I will come after
With
a sore derriere.
Who
Goes There?
Who
goes there?
A day
trader.
What
do you want?
A glass
of beer.
Where
is your money?
I forgot.
Then
get lost,
You
drunken sot.
There
was an old man
There
was an old man,
And
he had some crack,
And
that's half;
He
put some in his pipe,
And
smoked it in the hall,
And
that's all.
P
o e m o p e n e d
A.
Muscle
B.
Gills
C.
Mantle
D.
Palpi
E.
Mouth
H.
Anus
I.
Intestine
L.
Liver
Four
Poets Whose Names End with N
Tennyson
Dickinson
Wharton
Whitman
The
Beach
My
girlfriend and I were at the beach when she commented
on how
appealing
she found a seagull that was eating nearby. I told
her that it
wasn't
cute, that it might not even really be a bird.
Hot
Twat Rhymes
hot
twat
butt
nut
lit
clit
piss
fit
muff
buff
gash
bash
mama
jama
hairy
cherry
stinky
pinky
smelly
deli
lucky
sucky
rubber
fucky
phony
baloney
assy
sassy
Titty
City
saggy
baggies
trick
prick
slick
dick
throne
bone
big
rig
cool
tool
pork
dork
cock
pot
wank
shank
pink
dink
rank
crank
stink
kink
knob
job
punk
spunk
boob
lube
ream
cream
Moo
Goo
Gai
Poon
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